Felicity & Ferocity

Bubba and Tom

Never make fun of people who tell you they wash their collard greens on the gentle cycle in the washing machine, or spend breakfasttime telling you about how carrying cell phones in your pocket can cause infertility. They may just be the very people who come and rescue you from a gas station at 11:00 at night because your car won't start.

You also may see there at said gas station the kind of people who you classify, stereotype as "hicks". With the awefulest names like "Bubba," who look about the stature of someone who has 3 balanced meals a day of coffee and cigarrettes. But scorn them not-- for they may be the very people who try to help you jump your car-- they will even lend you their jumper cables for a while, and offer you to put a new starter in your car for; "I cu'd put a new starter in your car for ...twunny bucks." Riiight. These hicks are of the knowledgable sort- you can tell by the car grease on their hands. And they haven't even touched your car yet. God bless the hicks of the world-- we need someone to fix our cars. --You nearly trust them-- until Bubba and his friend Tom start having a conversation in front of you on how to use jumper cables. "No, Bubba, you dingaling!! --ladies, I'm sorry you had to hear that-- You attach the POSITIVE first to the RED one and THEN you do the same to the OTHER car." "Naw!! I'm SURE you do it THIS way."

uhm. yeah. ....time passes... a real mechanic fixes your car. He tells you how much it might cost. "You're MEAN" I say. "Look, I'm just trying to be honest, ok?!" he says. Then he tells you how much it will REALLY cost. It has a comma in it. you cry.

Then Mom tells you that it's all God's money anyway and if this is how He wants to spend it, that's up to him!!

The Lord gives. The Lord takes away. Blessed be the Name of the Lord.

I am home safe. And well taken care of. hoorah!